梦的连接

Posted by Cofyc, on April 6, 2008, 2:04 am

最近几天总是做相同的梦,至少连续三天以上吧。奇特的梦,折磨人。又时序颠倒,对外界有感应存在时已是午间,更显得痛苦,毕竟是在大白天里做噩梦。

    说是噩梦,但似乎也算不上,只是梦十分地奇怪,但又使人欲罢不能。不明白,想忽视过去,但林林种种的许多,某种意义上说,是“不断地重复”吧,虽说有些许差别,却迫使人不得不放在心上。

    这些,总会让人产生些滑稽的想法,或者说十分地傻气,也许在他人眼里,就是如此这样的。但,没有办法,什么办法也没有,因为心中已认定这个世界必定有常规可循。不过,若这是命运使然的话,在这种坚持的放弃或改变前,不断做些荒诞的事情,到也是可以原谅的。毕竟是命运决定,由不得己。

    于是,今天刚醒,就下定心意,要将梦境回忆起来。说起来十分可笑,似乎这种心意是在梦中就已决定。如此便是,梦中决定在梦醒后要将梦中的意境回忆起来。这似乎比,不记得梦却晓得在不断地重复相同的梦,更有意思。

    虽说,总身不由己地做些滑稽可笑的事情,但倘若事情还有些意思,到也无妨。慢慢地回忆,把梦境的图画,或者是对梦的灵觉感应,在大脑消散之前,用可以记忆的、特定的、从属于本身的符号、文字、话语等记录下来。如此,就有了对梦的连接,而不至于只剩下类似幻觉的感应。

    于是最后,除却无法表达的记忆感知外,记下了如此一些符号或连接:屋子,家?,对话,不理解,折磨,现实,错误,隔离,绝望,无力感,丧失;另一个屋子,下雨,鱼,无数的鱼,血,欲望,满足,错误,灭杀,无限的鱼,无限的欲望,无限的满足,恐怖,折磨,寻求,无解,绝望,无力感,丧失。

    真是荒唐的词话语。但,不可停止!不可停止?为什么却也不明白,傻透了!那我又可以怎么做了?封闭一切,以避免自我厌恶?莫明其妙,我在厌恶什么!是自身,还是自身在形象世界中的存在。 continue...

0 comment - Tags: self, dream, nightmare, memory, despair, hate, vain

The stuff of dreams

Posted by Cofyc, on January 5, 2008, 12:01 pm

Yesterday, I read a article by Jay Dixit about dreams. It says that dreaming is a sensitive system that tries to pay much attention to the threatening cues in our environment, and as Harvard's Barrett puts it, the dreams are just thinking in a different biochemical state.

    This artcile descrbiles a bit devilish study first in which researchers at the University of Wisconsin at Madison tried to find out what will happen when a rat stops dreaming. The result of study was that rats lost their ability to defend themeslves. Finnish psychologist Antti Revonsuo believes that this is not because they were exhausted but because they were robbed of their dreams. Dreams, he contends, are a training ground in which animals and people alike go over the behaviors that probably are the key to prevent themselves from danger. In article, the author analyzed many situations and gave out several real instances, as well as quoted Revonsuo and other scientists' arguments and conclusions, trying to figure out the stuff of dreams. It's amusing and thought-provoking, and really gave me a clear recognition of dreams.

    In a article of New Concept English I read before, I already knew that we need sleep not because we need to rest our bodies but because we need dreams. In psychiatrist William Dement's experiments, people in test who showed some personality disorders because they were disturbed from their rapid eye-movement or REM sleep—which indicates dreaming—for several nights on end. And in this article, I got to know more about dreams.

    Dreams basically simuates virtual realities, most of which are so lifelike that they often confuse us and make us think that is really happening. I read a book on psychopathology of everyday life and interpretation of dreams by Freud before, he told that dreams are secret accomplishments or satisfactions of subconscious wishes. This author also quoted Freud's opinion, that Freud saw dreams as convoluted pathways toward fulfilling forbidden aggressive and sexual wishes and that frightening dreams were just wishes in disguises. It makes sense for me, yet this article goes further in addressing the function of dreams. It says that dreams are a sort of theater in which our brains screen realistic scenarios and the primary of function of negative dreams is rehearsal for similar real events, in which we don't dream about other people, only ourselves. We practice reactions in our dreams over and over again to ensure our own survivals when confronted with a threat.

    Just a few days before, after I watched a lot of violent and bloody murder films at late night, I dreamed a lot about scenarios that I was chased and threatened. In that cold lifeless world, there were dangerous events, negative emotions, monsters, near-death experiences and such far more sinister than in waking life. Now, I know that our dreams just served to protect us, why I dreamed that horrific scene that night because during our sleep the dreaming brains scans emotional memories, when it detects a memory trace with a strong negative emotion—which probably derived from awful experiences in real life—and then it constructs a nightmare around that theme. Probably it feels not good at frist, but it just tries to train us in dreams. If you conquer dread in dreams, yourself will improve. So a function of dreams as Revonsuo thinks is to protect and prepare us, thereby dreams simulate emergency situations and provide an arena for safe training. Why the dream world is so filled peril is to simuate the potential threats and prepare us to react quickly in dangerous encounters.

    In last paragraph "The Nighttime Edge", it talks about the dreams' edge over consicous thought. It gives an example we all knew in high school that how German chemist Friedrich August Kekule found the molecular structure of benzene, which is because he dreamed about a snake devouring its own tail and this had inspired him. Sometimes we probably had been in similar situations, for which we got better at tasks just by dreaming about them. Thus, a sleep researcher at Harvard Medical School, Robert Stickgold holds that dreaming is much more complex than rehearsal. I totally agree with his statement that sleep makes us to integrate and consolidate knowledge and during sleep our brains are making sense of the world, discoving new associations among existing memories, looking for patterns, formulating rules. Stickgold also think this is how we create meaning. This makes me think a lot. Although we rarely remember our dreams, but dreaming practically happens in our brains during sleep. Even if we are not aware of what is happening in dreams, we probably all had felt before that we once better understand some complicated problems after nights of dreaming.

    After reading this article, I started to think the dreaming as a sort of thinking activity on another level just as Barrett contends that the purpose of dreaming is as broad as all waking thought and says dreams as really just thinking in a different biochemical state. Dreams is also worring what we are worrying about in waking life, however levels differ, it often solves problems in a fancy way, unconsciously. And so it is, ancestors believed that dreams predicted the future. But we all don't understand dreaming completely, even though it is so basic to human existence. It consumes years of our lives, certainly plays a important role in our lives. In this area, we need more research.

    At last, I highly recommend this article to anyone interested in more information on this topic, you will know the stuff of dreams more deep inside.

0 comment - Tags: stuff, dream, nightmare, fantasizing, psychology, freud, english

Extremely awful experience last night

Posted by Cofyc, on January 2, 2008, 12:01 pm

At 12 o'clock last night, I just woke up from short-term sleep. After the completion of a task—an easy learning thing—it's still a long time to the dawn, thereby I decided to do something to kill time.

    Although I think it's fairly awful to watch videos like movies, cartoons and such at late nights all along, I guess probably mental condition is comparatively at low and lack of self-restraint at night. I always couldn't stop doing some things which I would overly regret soon. Last night it's even worse because I watched lots of films full of violence, death and bloody murder and the like. Bad experience it was! I simply only wanted to watch some other kinds of films to have a fun at first, but these films had certainly attracted me. Doomed to be not ok. I didn't like any of them!

    I felt horribly bad and was tired when the time was getting close to 6, thus I forced myself to sleep holding a thought that I could get rid of all unfavorable influences imposed on me. But nothing was relieved, nightmares chased me continuously, made me feel like in a cold lifeless horrific scene until I got up from bed hours later. Terribly afflictive it was! I didn't have any deep sleep, whereas nightmares even reminded me of some of them I had before, like nightmare season 2? 

    I cannot remember any detail now, but the feelings still remain. Don't want to have them anymore.

0 comment - Tags: nightmare, experience, night, english